Where I live, the sky is so blue today. It’s blue like the sky in the woods where he raped me for the first time. And even though the air is cold today, the sun is warm – just like it was when I was little. And this time I can see his face, something I couldn’t see before. I can’t tell if my mind is playing tricks on me or if it’s real. 

I’m so anxious this week. I’m anxious and I don’t know why. I just want to not be anxious anymore. I don’t want to have flashbacks anymore. I don’t want this.