As the pulp begins to settle, the chaos of my sister’s chronic illness subsides for a little while, I am left feeling empty and vulnerable. Perhaps it’s the raw emotions of these past 5 days, or maybe the transparency of my recent blog posts, or the lack of emotional high from YTT…. Either way, I feel numb and distant. It’s like I’m watching my life in slow motion right now, past and present. I have no control over anything. 

I think this is resulting in my trauma memories being more prevalent. I see the little girl that he hurts and I want to hug her and tell her so many things…. 

One day, it will just be orange juice and nothing more.