I’ve been eating “normally” … or relatively normally… for almost 10 years. I was anorexic from the time I was 14 until I was about 20 years old. After all of these years of “eating like a normal person,” I am reminded that I actually never really eat “normally.” I still eat super slow. I still don’t like to eat in front of people. And I still pick my food apart. The muffin in the picture… yeah I’ve been eating for 15 minutes now and all I’ve really done is mutilate the muffin. It’s good. But there are so many people in here that I don’t want to actually eat it. I’m not even hungry anymore. 

It leaves me wondering if this part of my brain will ever change….