I have huge fears surrounding the dentist. I only go when I absolutely have to. This week, one of my teeth broke when a filling fell out. Today, as I was laying back in the dental chair, with my mouth wide open and a dentist’s hands poking, prodding, and fondling my teeth, I realized why.
There is nothing in my adult life that makes me more vulnerable than going to the dentist. I have to put all of my trust into this guy that I’ve never met before…. while I’m laying flat on my back. I can’t do it. It’s so stressful.
I didn’t have any flashbacks; however, all of the fear and sensations that come with flashbacks were present today. And it occurred to me how going to the dentist is just another reminder of the abuse that I endured as a child…. completely vulnerable…. on my back…. with no choice but to just lay there.